Left handed VS Right handed

March 16, 2018

 

 I know this is a picture of 2 people arm-wrestling where you both need to use the same arm, but I couldn't think of something else OK, give me a break.

 

 

A lifelong battle between 2 different people. One of them casually stands by and gets everything handed to them while the others are completely outnumbered and getting cornered in all the daily aspects of life. We are a dying breed. Driven to extinction, we fight for what's holy and rightful. Even in this country were equality is part of our law....... Uhh, are we still talking about hands ? Hell yeah we are. So I am going to drop some facts about the difference between left handed people and right handed people.

 

You will come to the conclusion that their is some discrimination going on here, but let this not cloud your judgement. Left-handed people are just as superior as right-handed people maybe even more so ;). You'll see. Here we go 

 

School

 

Just like every other year of school you have to get new equipment. Pen's, notebooks, highlighters, some paper to wrap your books in. The standard stuff. Little did you know that most of those things were especially made for right-handed people.

 

 

Notebooks

Take for example : notebooks. You would think writing from the left to the right is no problem. True, it's not. But once you're  passed that page you continue on the other side where your left with the ring poking you on the side of your palm, because there is no place to put your hand down, leaving ring marks on your skin, which you then had to explain to your mum when you got home. Right handed people don't have this issue.

 

Pen's

In elementary school you used ink. Ink needs time to dry. If your palm is on the notebook when your writing everytime you look back at what your written it is all ******* up, your hand is blue like a smurf and your notebook is one big mess. God-bless the moment when we could write with normal ballpoint pen's. No dirty notebooks, no angry teachers, peace was finally restored.

 

Scissors

 

All you right-handed people think how the hell can scissors be an issue for left handed people. I'll explain. The blades of the scissors are outlined in a way that if a left-handed person uses the scissors it doesn't cut the paper. Only if you hold it in the strangest angle this is when it works. That's why there are left handed scissors. How convenient. 

 

For any of you that are left-handed and need scissors that actually cut : https://www.delinkshandigenwinkel.nl/ this shop has every left handed item you need. Your welcome :)

 

Measering tape

 

You might not have noticed it because you guys do it from the other side. But let me tell you. You never really get used to reading upside down. 

 

Sitting at the dining table

 

My family can vouch for me (especially my sister) when we often had a hick up about bumping my elbow into her while eating. We either had to move 4 meters away from eachother or switch places, which of course was a big deal to her because this was HER spot. "I always sit on this chair..... just hold your arms together when you're eating." 

 

Excactly, very inconvenient.

 

Giving high fives or a handshake

 

Giving high fives or handshakes creates a big fuss and can be really awkward when giving a high five or handshake as a leftie. It's like everything suddenly is reversed and before you know it you are driving on the highway in England, you're a ghost rider sitting behind the steering wheel on the right side and you are going to crash into someone. This is basically what happens when giving a handshake. Unless the reflexes of the other person in front of you are significant quick to pull his hand back and bring the other one forward it is always going to be a crash and burn. 

 

That's why I added a little segment in my resumé : Dominant hand : left. So when I have a interview they are prepared. You know, safety procautions.

 

 

People asking stupid questions

 

- You write with your left hand? Do you have blonde hair? Shut up! (don't ask for the obvious people)

- huh? are you left-handed? Yes guys that is a thing. chill.

- Did you know that left-handed people die sooner? Oh really which study proves that? Well, I read it on the internet. So everything you read on the internet is true? .... Exactly, think I've proven my point.

- Hey why is the side of your hand covered in ink? ........................(no comment)

- Why is there a whole shop devoted to left handed people? Maybe cause all the everyday items are made for only right-handed people??!!!

- Can you stop bumping your elbow into me? For my lefties out there. Whenever approaching a dining table choose your position at the dinning table carefully. 

 

Desks

 

I would like to talk about the moron who invented the school desks. I am not talking about the square ones I am talking about the ones that are in almost every university. You have these high school desks that has a side part where you can put down your arm on the RIGHT side. So inconvenient.

 

Do we really have to hug our neighbour to be able to put our hand down? I know that only 15% in the world is left-handed,  but if you could make just like a couple left-handed desks for those 2 people that are left handed in the classroom, would that be to much to ask???. I am sure it fits in the budget :). 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

With my final subject I am going to hit it ''out of the park'' which is :

 

SPORTS

 

We all know that when you have gymnastics at school and summer comes around, you sometimes play baseball. Alright, so all the students were given a task. You had The hitters ( sitting on the bench waiting there turns to hit and run) and the catchers (scattered around the whole field trying to catch the balls that were hit by the hitters). Every catcher was handed a glove. Of course there were only 2 left handed gloves or in some cases NONE. 

 

This was not only stupid (cause I felt like an idiot of never catching a single ball) also it is completely unfair. Why do they not encounter the possibility that there are left-handed people in the classes. It completely ruins the experience. 

 

Baseball was just the start. How about tennis. You always had to remind the teacher that you're left-handed ,because you didn't know how to do it with your right hand, which then lead to a very awkward explanation and poor example of the teacher. Cause frankly they all sucked at playing with their left-hand. Good thing there were also sports like trampoline jumping, soccer, hockey and basketball. Those were the better days.

 

I hope you are now convinced that left-handed people have it tougher then you think and that they are often at a disadvantage. So next time you laugh at a guy/girl because he/she doesn't do something properly, take note that they might not be given the fair chances you received.

 

Thank you very much for taking this time to get to know a little bit more about our struggles in life. Much appreciated. 

 

Maybe light a candle tonight knowing that you live in such cruel world,  show some respect. No sorry I am just messing with you :P. 

 

Have a great weekend people !

 

GO LEFTIES <3

 

Yours sincerely,

 

The left handed writer

 

 

 

 

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